Wake up, it’s urgent.” In Indian families, urgent could range from medical emergency to shortage of curd for Aloo Paranthas. I opened eyes reluctantly to scan the room for clues. Mom stood there with a cup of my morning tea in her hand and visible anger towards my father for waking me up so early.
“I’ve received this message that says my Paytm KYC has been suspended and if I don’t call them immediately, they’ll block my account within 24 hours,” Dad spoke worriedly. I kept a poker face while sipping my tea and checked his phone. Within seconds, I knew it was a scam because a) no app would send such a message, b) immediately was spelled as immediotely and c) the most obvious one — my father didn’t even have the Paytm app.
Since the beginning of the internet, “419 frauds” (‘419’ refers to the Nigerian Criminal Code that deals with fraud) have prevailed. We’ve all seen emails where huge amounts of money were offered in return of a small investment. Frankly, the early scammers were easy to spot mainly because of their modus operandi. Some of the classic ones were:
a) Nigerian Prince offering to split his inheritance: The oldest trick in the book. In a world where your own brother thinks twice before lending you money for Vada Pav, this was a hard-to-believe offer and raised the red flag instantly.
b) Oil at discounted price: This one made claims that the sender has secured oil at discounted price and is willing to sell in the same amount. However, India isn’t America and hardly anyone cared about oil reservoirs. Even if someone would’ve bothered, they would’ve replied “Bhaiya, 20 ka dalwa do” (Brother, refill for 20 bucks).
c) Employment offer: This scam promised a dream job in a foreign country along with amazing perks and demanded advance application fees in return. However, these scammers underestimated Indians who mostly replied with “Sorry Sir, I want to get government job only for marriage purposes.”
I could’ve told the truth to my father. However, I’ve been educating my parents time and again about online frauds ever since they started using smartphones and this seemed like a good test to understand how much they’ve learnt. I decided to let my Dad take the driver’s seat.
Here are the events that followed in chronological order:
By 10 am, my father had lost any hopes that he had in me and realised that I wasn’t going to help him. He then tried to get in touch with my brother/cousins/any millennial in the family who could assist him with this matter.
Around 11 am, he switched on the desktop PC and googled about Paytm. After multiple failed attempts, he decided to pay a visit to his SBI bank branch in hopes of getting clarity.
He returned around noon and looked even more puzzled. On questioning about what happened at the bank, he replied that none of the staff members had any clue and even the bank manager was worried about his Paytm KYC getting blocked.
At 1 pm, lunch was served. Dad, however, was still busy finding more information about this by sending queries on his WhatsApp groups. He had lost his appetite and it was only after I suggested that he should call the number given in the SMS, did he touch his plate.
At 2 pm, Dad kept all his KYC documents handy and called the scammer’s number. I asked him to put the call on speaker mode in case I had to intervene. The scammer went on with his usual script and told my Dad his KYC will be blocked unless there are some modifications made to his Paytm app. He said that if my Dad installs a couple of apps, the modifications could be done remotely. I understood that these apps would give remote access to my father’s phone to the scammer and will compromise his personal information. However, I knew the scammer had a bigger challenge ahead.
My father continued asking multiple questions primarily revolving around what is Paytm app and within next 20 minutes, I could feel that the scammer was losing his patience. He instructed my Dad to download the Paytm app from the play store and then call again.
At 3 pm Dad called back and told the scammer that he could not install the app from the play store. My father went about for another 20 minutes explaining to the scammer how diabetes has affected his vision and he can hardly read texts on the phone. The scammer sympathised and offered to help.
Mom invited us all for the evening tea at 5 PM and the scammer was still struggling to assist my father. I sipped my tea in peace while I could feel the scammer pulling his hair.
It was 6 pm and the scammer had given up hopes. He asked my father if he had any banking apps on his phone and much to his dismay, my father said no. My father said that he had few motivational videos that he could forward.
Frustrated, the scammer hurled insults at my father and blocked him. I’m no expert, but it takes a lot to make a spammer block your number. I was proud of my father. I realised that my parents were immune to online fraud. I slept in peace that day.
“Wake up, it’s urgent,” my Dad was there again.
“I think you can handle it,” I went back to sleep smiling.
(Sudhanshu Ramteke is a stand-up comedian)
