It’s too late now, I will go tomorrow”, I thought.
Last year around Christmas, after having watched several motivational videos, I decided to bring a positive change in my lifestyle and made a resolution to be healthier in 2020. My friends suggested that I should run daily (not from my problems, but physically) in order to achieve the same and even encouraged me to participate in marathons.
Cut to the present day: I’ve failed miserably and skipped running four days in a row. My t-shirt quote — “I don’t run to add days to my life, I run to add life to my days” is taunting me by getting tighter with each passing day. I’ve pulled a muscle while attempting to reach for the coffee mug and my marathon dreams are long gone. As I lay still on this cold winter morning, my brain throws the perfect analogy for this epic fail resolution — ‘Your 2020 trial period has expired.’
From the last two years, my online life has only consisted of ‘1 month trial periods’. Softwares, apps, subscriptions and services – everything comes with a free short tryout period where you can try all the features and go ahead only when you’re satisfied. I think this concept should be used in our day-to-day lives as well.
1. Relationships: Every relationship should have a free trial month. Not the ‘all-so-good’ courtship period, but one month where both the parties show their true self. Any Raj can fall in love with a Simran who is happy all the time. However, it takes a real hero to love a girl who refuses to order her own French Fries but then eats all of yours.
2. Adulthood: When I was a kid, I wanted to become an adult quickly in order to make my own decisions. However, I realise now that this great power comes with great adult responsibilities that I’m not ready to handle. If someone would have given me a trial period for adulthood, instead of teaching me algebra, I would’ve enjoyed my childhood better. If nothing else, I could’ve been prepared for this phase with skills like cooking, washing clothes, arguing with maids etc.
3. Haircuts: This one is self explanatory. Every time I visit the hair stylist, I should get a trial period for whatever haircut they recommend. Any haircut that makes me look like Shah Rukh Khan for two days and Kamaal R Khan for the next two months needs to be pre-screened so that I don’t cry myself to sleep every day.
I was still in bed wondering if this was a foolproof way of dealing with the current situation. Before the first month of the New Year ends, most people already give up on their resolutions. It demotivates them at the beginning of the year and makes them question their own abilities. I think there should be a trial month right before January where you get to try everything the New Year has to offer.
Just like the zero period that we used to have during the school days to prepare for the annual function. Just like each period was cut short by five minutes to make room for the zero period, we should reduce each calendar month by 2.5 days to make room for the trial month. Imagine the benefits:
1. You will be able to filter out resolutions that make no sense practically. For example: Drinking more water and being more productive at work cannot happen simultaneously because you’ll be rushing to the loo frequently. Instead, you can replace productivity with ‘get a better job’ resolution by giving job interviews while you’re in the loo.
2. Your failures will mean nothing. You will have the chance to fail at multiple resolutions without feeling bad or being answerable for it. For that one month, you can feel like the government of the country and do as you please without worrying about the consequences.
3. You will be able to prioritise your resolutions. If the choice is between buying a car and saving money for kid’s college education, you will realise within a month that a kid’s education is not worth riding bike in this cold weather. You can even let go of the guilt by telling yourself that your child makes TikTok videos and therefore will not need higher education.
I finally got up from the bed and decided that I will treat this entire month as trial period and take things slow. The pressure to do things was suddenly lifted. I spent the entire day going through other resolutions to see if they deserved to be in my February 2020 list. Before sleeping, I activated three alarms and readied my ‘The body achieves what the mind believes’ t-shirt for the next morning.
I woke up to an even colder morning and the mind surrendered even before the body could respond.
“It’s too late now, I will go tomorrow,” I thought.
(Sudhanshu Ramteke is a stand-up comedian)
