Coined by anthropologist Dana Raphael in the 1970s, matrescence refers to the physical, psychological, and emotional changes a woman experiences during her transition into motherhood.
It’s a term that’s only recently gaining the attention it deserves, shedding light on the often complex identity shift that accompanies becoming a mother.
More Than Just Postpartum: Understanding the Depth of Matrescence
While the postpartum period focuses on a woman’s recovery after childbirth, matrescence is broader and deeper. It begins during pregnancy and can continue for years—even a lifetime.
It’s not just about sleepless nights or learning how to swaddle a baby. It’s about asking questions like:
Who am I now that I’m a mother?
Why do I feel joy and grief simultaneously?
Where did the “old me” go—and do I want her back?
This transition can stir conflicting emotions: pride and loss, empowerment and confusion, love and loneliness—all at once.
The Invisible Struggle: Why We Don’t Talk About It Enough
Society often glamorizes motherhood—celebrating baby bumps, cute onesies, and picture-perfect Instagram posts. But what about the emotional earthquakes beneath the surface?
Many new mothers quietly struggle with guilt for not feeling “grateful enough,” or shame for missing their pre-mom life. Since these feelings clash with the idealized version of motherhood, women may suppress them—leading to isolation and self-doubt.
Acknowledging matrescence validates these feelings as normal and expected, not signs of failure.
The Science Behind the Shift
Researchers have found that pregnancy and childbirth can reshape a woman’s brain, particularly in areas related to empathy, social interaction, and emotional regulation. Hormones like oxytocin flood the system, enhancing attachment but also increasing vulnerability.
Combine that with sleep deprivation, shifting roles, and societal expectations, and it’s no surprise that many mothers feel like they’re losing themselves—even as they find a new version of who they are.
Matrescence in Indian Contexts: A Silent Tug-of-War
In Indian households, matrescence can be even more layered. Along with personal transformation, women often juggle expectations from joint families, cultural norms, and professional ambitions.
A new mother may be celebrated with rituals like the Seemantha or Naming Ceremony, but her mental health might still be an afterthought. Discussions about identity loss or emotional overwhelm are rare and often dismissed as “baby blues” or hormonal drama.
How to Navigate the Journey of Matrescence
There’s no one-size-fits-all guide to becoming a mother, but here are a few ways to support the process:
Name it to tame it: Simply knowing that matrescence exists can be comforting. It gives words to what often feels unexplainable.
Seek community: Whether it’s online mom groups or offline support circles, talking to others on the same path helps.
Practice self-compassion: You don’t have to be the “perfect mom.” You just have to be a human, doing her best.
Revisit passions: Motherhood can co-exist with other identities. Making time for your hobbies and work isn't selfish—it's essential.
Therapy helps: Professional support can make a huge difference in understanding and embracing your evolving self.
Matrescence isn’t a problem to fix—it’s a transformation to respect. Much like adolescence, it’s messy, beautiful, confusing, and vital.
By talking about it openly, we not only support new mothers but also build a culture where women are allowed to evolve, rediscover themselves, and grow—right alongside their children.
