Met someone new online? Here's how to find the right kind of person

The Bridge Chronicle's guide to investing in the right kind of people
Guide to knowing your recent match better
Guide to knowing your recent match betterImage: The Bridge Chronicle

While we live through the pandemic, loneliness has taken a toll on a lot of people. Even for people who have begun living with their families again, the pandemic is one of the worst times, as most people have had to leave their regular lives behind.

This has led the youth to resort to only available alternate outside their friend circle — online dating sites. From March to May 2020, OkCupid saw a 700 per cent increase in dates. And over on Bumble, video calls increased by 70 per cent. Even if the dates are online, and most people aren't yet ready to meet in person, the time spent on these apps has also increased in manifolds. But how do you know that the person you are talking to is genuine?

The catch with online dating is there is always a gamble for meeting the right kind of people. Irrespective of what you are looking for, it is important to find the right kind of people. Especially during these trying times, investing your time in the wrong kind of people can give you a setback but with the right kind of people, we can build lasting relationships.

The Bridge Chronicle brings to you a quick guide to understanding your new matches better.

How they keep to their commitment

Say you plan a Netflix party on Friday night with your match and he agrees to confirm on Friday morning. But it's already been noon, and he hasn't said anything about it. Alternatively, you decide on a Netflix party for Friday night and he promises to confirm Friday morning. It's 11 am on Friday, and he confirms on you.

It is not necessary, that in the first situation, your match was unwilling to continue with the plan but might be that he prioritises other things. This is also an example of how well the person manages commitments in his regular life.

The way they treat people below them

This might seem difficult in an online dating scenario but it is one of the most essential things to know. Strike up conversations that lead your match to talk about working situation and talk about their teams. It is essential to know how people talk about someone below them because it also reflects on how they might talk about others.

How they act when they make a mistake

This is an excellent criterion to better understand how a person thinks and behaves. It is okay to make mistakes, but how a person responds to them is what makes all the difference. People often get defensive or try to cover up mistakes. But it takes a bigger person to accept them.

How they act when they need something from you

People who are motivated to do form connections based on certain needs often have a different style of approaching subjects. As opposed to people who seek real connections. So the next time you talk to your match, make it a point to bring up topics that could help them be more open about what they seek. Ask questions like, what if we don't meet, would you be willing to keep up the connection. And see where it goes.

We live in very uncertain times, and it might not be over anytime soon. But making good of this time is important. If the people you are dealing with are no value add in your regular life, it is possibly the time to move on to something more productive.

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