Soham Pareekh’s candid message—detailing his journey of isolation, rejection, and unwavering passion for building—captures a psychological narrative familiar to many in the tech industry. His story is not just personal; it reflects a broader pattern among engineers, founders, and innovators who persistently create, often in the face of adversity.
At the core of Soham’s mindset is a deep-seated love for building. For many techies, the act of creating—whether it’s code, products, or entire companies—is more than a profession; it’s an identity. This is rooted in intrinsic motivation, where the satisfaction comes from the process itself rather than external rewards. When Soham says, “building is the only thing I’ve ever truly known,” he is expressing a psychological phenomenon where creation becomes a source of meaning, self-worth, and even therapy.
Soham’s experience of being “isolated, written off, and shut out” is a recurring theme in the tech world. Many innovators, especially those with unconventional ideas or personalities, find themselves on the margins of teams or organizations. This sense of exclusion can be painful, but for some, it becomes a powerful catalyst. Psychologists call this the “adversity advantage”—the ability to transform setbacks into fuel for growth and achievement.
This adversity often triggers a resilience response. Instead of succumbing to discouragement, individuals like Soham become more determined to prove themselves. The anger and frustration (“I’m pissed. And I’ve got something to prove.”) are channeled into relentless work and innovation. This is a classic example of reactance, where perceived restrictions or rejections only intensify the drive to succeed.
Soham’s new team is described as one that “backs misfits.” In tech, being a misfit is often a badge of honor. Nonconformists are more likely to challenge norms, take risks, and pursue breakthrough ideas. Companies that embrace misfits often see greater innovation, as these individuals are less constrained by conventional thinking. This “misfit culture” is a hallmark of many successful startups, where diversity of thought is prized over uniformity.
The tech industry attracts people who are deeply passionate, curious, and driven by problem-solving. However, it also demands rapid innovation, which can marginalize those who don’t immediately fit in or conform to groupthink. As a result, many talented individuals experience cycles of acceptance and exclusion.
The reality for techies like Soham is a blend of pain and purpose. The setbacks are real, but so is the satisfaction of building something meaningful. This psychological journey—marked by resilience, intrinsic motivation, and a willingness to embrace the misfit label—has powered some of the tech industry’s greatest successes.
